斷了的弦 再彈一遍 我的世界 你不在裡面
我的指尖 已經彈出繭 還是無法留你在我身邊

斷了的弦 再怎麼練 我的感覺 你已聽不見
你的轉變 像斷掉的弦 再怎麼接 音都不對 你的改變我能夠分辨

hmm.. tis song is veri true.. tings hv change le... u can no longer stay by my side.. nor can i ever get u bk... bcz feelings hv change le.. we hv a gap between one another a gap of trust n love der is totally no chance of being together.. wad i feel most sad bout is tt u dun even wana be frenz with mi.. duno is u too childish to hv tt kind of tinking or wad but ya.. even frendship tis kind of tings oso cnt force de... sigh...

我會發著呆 然後忘記你 接著緊緊閉上眼
想著那一天 會有人代替 讓我不再想念你
我會發著呆 然後微微笑 接著緊緊閉上眼
又想了一遍 你溫柔的臉 在我忘記之前

I will stare out in blank space n slowly 4get u... waiting 4 tt sum1 to cme into my life so tt i will stop missing u... indeed its veri true.. 4get all the past memories.. if u can be so jue to 4get mi.. i oso can... I CAN n I WILL!!!

mi juz write finish den evrything gone again.. sigh stupid keyboard...! as was saying paiseh long time nv update blog le... been quite busi... schedule every dae pack... woo~... the day aft start sch le... 3 weeks hols juz lidat finish duno wad is tis man... my ophir trip was tiring but nv magange to climb up to the peak.. not enuf time... yupz not tt we were weak.. but it was kinda impossible to climb finish withnin a day... ya lorx.. had 4 leech bites during this expedition quite pathetic sia... end up having skin infection which until now still habn recoover...
my results r out got 4B+ n 1 B.. no A quite sad but nevertheless at least no C.. otherwise ........ btu the results quite expected la nuthing much... mon start sch tues holiday wed thurs n fri poly forum cruise.. whoohoo my schedule quite pack horX.. haha! tt y keep on kena scolding frm parents.. summore tis mth my hp bill add up to be 80plus ... sheesh... need pay like wad sia.. hmm but wadever.. cant be bothered... mi nowadaes taking tings veri easi... if evrthing i hv to put it to heart i m veri vex n get depression easily.. tt y now not so stupid le.. keke....
hmmm.. i tink nuthing much to update le... the rest is juz like erm... my hectic life which i duno how to mention keke... k man... gtg do other stuffs... TRY to keep tis updated... keke *wink*

FeeLinG sick now.. yest had a bleeding nose 4 half an hour.. tis morn wke up again bleeding nose... sigh.. poor mi... mi gona go Mt ophir tonite... if onli God can show His Healing Power on me n let me be healed so that I can go Mt Ophir Tonite.. yepz... been asking pple to pray 4 mi.. yuPZ.. tis past few daes been busi with either the prep for mt ophir or went work... not a lot rest lorx.. saw him yest.. indirectly tok to him.. duno how sae la.. but prob tis is an improvement.. now mi sick I oso nv fail to inform him that I am sick.. though his reply in the msg was to ask mi tke care of myself otherwise no one else knows how to take care of mi le coz mi myself cant even tke care of myself.. but all these r juz enuf.. at least i noe he don't hate me at all... haIX... hope Lord will moved him and bring him back to His side.. wonder hows he been feeing recently.. does he still have mi in his heart?? 4 ya.. I am among his steads the shortest time being with him.... feel so sorry and bad.. no wonder he can easily let mi go... bcz the bond is still not der yet.. but he is my longest stead ... 4mths... failure ain't I... tinking back.. tears can't hlp but fall again... realli wan him bk by my side..............

todae is officially my holidae.. finish my o level english at 11.. hmm.. I duno how do i fare this time.. Really no comments, no feelings at all... rather manageable lorx.. Juz pray that I might past somehow.. Did manage to finish but hmm.. not reallie perfect lorx... I duno.. what done is done der is no turning back..
Todae is Sebastian birthday.. went down store to wish him happi birthdae as well as past my frend sumting... den saw him at store.. didn't sae a word to one another but onli a "bye" when i was leaving.. I noe my frend sae tt if he luv mi no matter how big a mistake i commit if i ask 4 4gifness he shld 4gif mi.. but since he didn't its obvious tt he dun luv mi.. maybe he did luv mi once.. but its already the past, the bond wasn't strong.. n i guess so.. sum even sae tt our relationship was onli a test... i duno.. yes doubts began to arise.. but i still trust wad he had been to me .. maybe i am foolish to tink tis way.. but i tink tis is wad love is.. that is being blind... i duno how he is feeling.. juz now when der was onli 2 of us in der.. he played the song "Ji Shi Ben" and started singing.. the song is like so sad lorx.. did he mean anything? or am i being too sensitive agian... I duno n i hv no idea.. haiz.. wad is this.. cant' tok as frenz.. everything oso cnt den how??!!

hmm.. 1 day never update my blog liao.. tired man this week will be ratehr hectic for me.. tomorrow my o levels scary sia.. I hope I can pass this time lorx.. Lord please guide me.. Hmmm.. Got back my UT 4 results Sci got a B, VB got a B+.. hmm.. i duno lol rather crappy though.. no A for my predicted module grade sad sia.. Anyway trying to occupy myself so that I do not think so much.. The worst thing is that he don't even wana be friends with me.. Whassup with him.. Lord please tell me what is going on with him .. what is he thinking about... He been really avoiding me lorx.. haiZ.. I duno but i am realli afraid of guys.. Had thought he was a hao nan ren .. reallie tot so.. but he is no longer le .. y evrytime i lose sum1 le den i realize who he actually is.. its realli scary the differences in the guy during the relationship n aft tt.. i duno.. duno what am i tinking n wad lord wan to do. but pls Lord guide me through this reallie need faith of u in me...

"Don't wana wake up alone animore"... The Corrs - All the love in the world... A very good song that I wana tell him.. Haiz... but I won't want to talk to him again le.. Even want also he sms me.. Beacause I do not want him to see me as an irritating pest. However, I do really miss him a lot... Wonder how he has been this past 1 week. I guess there is no chance for us to be together again.. All that we had has already become a good past memory of us.. Still very happy and have no regrets that he was once a part of my life.. He has proven to me what a hao nan ren is.. Veri gentleman n humorous... Even when I am saying all these he also won't know de.. Just want to voice out.. Feel very bored n lonely n lost.. No one to turn to when I need someone.. How i wish we were still friends, at least he will still talk to me and I can share my sadness with him.. But now cannot le.. haiz... Does he still have me in his heart? I know I should 4get him, not worth it after all the efforts I put in.. But haiz.. I duno le i duno le.. Lord just guide me.. Pray that you continue to guide him and look after him....

I am beginning to wonder what has this world turn to, and why things this way. Lastly, why am I thinking all these. Today I never go school. Just came home had my dinner and come online. Then saw the announcement window pop out saying that my facilitator Zhu Lei is not teaching anymore, and that he thank us for all giving him a great time, had we do so? I am beginning to doubt and I guess the answer is no at all. We had not given him a great time. When he first came to teach us, we find that he was crapping we ask a question he answer us another way. His lesson was so hard to get an A. Nevertheless I still strive and got my As. During lessons, no one will really hear him talk.
Now he is leaving us, I am beginning to regret, worst till we never even say goodbye to him... Why?! Why when people lose things then they start to regret, regret not cherishing in the first place and keep on cursing and swearing about something they have that should be cherish even it is bad? Till they lost it the they will start to feel sad and down about it? Why some people don't actually feel all these at all? Why people never learn their lesson. Time flies.. When something past your time in your life, you can never turn back to try it or see or experience it all over again.
Everytime I told myself now you learn your mistake, so from now on cherish whatver you have, but I did not. I never live life to the fullest. Clarissa what are you doing whats up with you. You used to be very committed with the ccas, but now what happen?! You have slack down a lot. Your life seems different. I don't know, feel very lost now. A lot things I should be doing I never do, but anyhow just spent my time away. There is no one I can turn to when I want to talk, there is no one to accompany me to shopping. All my friends are busy with their preparation of exams. Sigh, Lord please guide me. I am really sick and tired of my current life.